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Photo Credit: ABC

TV shows like The Bachelor and The Bachelorette promise a long-lasting love story between their contestants, but more often than not, the couples split after a short time together.

We have to ask ourselves: is this actually a realistic way to find love? Certainly not, says The Master of Matchmaking Julie Ferman, a professional matchmaker and dating coach. 

Reality shows can never be fully real, she says. The contestants know the cameras are rolling, and you need to question the reason people go on the show. Are they seeking attention, fame, or money?

"Falling in love is such a personal thing," says Ferman.  "First dates are usually not so exciting for TV."

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Photo Credit: ABC

Why Are Reality Shows About Love So Addicting? 

Love, dating and romance are just plain sexy!

"It's fun to peek into other people's lives," says Ferman. "We're teased with fairytales about princes and princesses from childhood into adulthood, and perhaps reality TV shows are just the modern day version of romance novels and fairytales."

So if our own love lives are boring, in disarray or a total disaster, it's fun to see other people stumbling through the romance dance. 

Do These Shows REALLY Work? 

Ferman says it’s rare that many of these couples stick together.

"Once the cameras stop rolling and they stop getting all of that fun attention and real life takes hold, it's pretty hard to make a manufactured relationship stick." - Julie Ferman

"Once the cameras stop rolling and they stop getting all of that fun attention and real life takes hold, it's pretty hard to make a manufactured relationship stick," says Ferman.

According to Ferman, it's most likely doomed from the start, and it would be a miracle for one of these made-for-TV relationships to actually survive in the real world.

The Bachelor/Bachelorette takes couples to gorgeous tropical locations and they’re always on some adventurous date followed by the most romantic evening, with the most romantic setting. It’s hard not to fall in love in that scenario. But what about when the show’s over and they have to go home and figure out who’s doing the dishes or who’s paying the bills? Once those magnificent dates are over, will they be able to handle real life like going to the supermarket? Probably not. 

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Photo Credit: ABC

On the plus side, when one decides to partake in a reality show to find love, you never know what might happen. It could be a fun adventure, but your reputation could be at stake. You may invest a lot of time and energy in something that may result in nothing or just a few seconds of fame. 

Ferman says that very few of her matchmaking clients have agreed to do an on-camera event of any kind.

"So, it would be a mistake to assume that the people who are on these reality TV shows are a realistic representation of the type of client who signs on with a real matchmaker"

What do you think? Are these reality shows about finding love realistic? To learn more about Ferman and to get some real-life dating advice, head to her site - JulieFerman.com.


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