Valentine's Day is a Perfect Time for a Talk About Love and Lust With Your Teenager
One troubling aspect of parenthood and having a teenager is finding the right time to have the sex talk. When and how? We'd like to propose a perfect parent to child Valentine's Day message. Let February 14 become the pefect opportunity to sit down with your child no matter his or her age and do an age appropriate training on the aspects of love and lust (ie: sex and babies) at whatever level of detail and complexity the particular child is ready to absorb. This means that your child begins to learn about sex and love very early on and in little bites.
Teenage Age Love Messages and Sexting Messages
The Cell phone has hearled in a new wave of need for parents to communicate with their children. While every parent dreads the sex talk with their teens for fear it's too soon or embarrassing, there is definitely room for parents to create an atmosphere and an ongoing dialogue about sex, love, lust and being a teen. Kids drop kints about when they are ready. Parents can often pin point the exact time to talk to their teens about sex using this little hidden indicator, suddenly your teen is secretive about his/her cell phone and when you check as yo have a perfect right and responsibility to do, you will find that your child may already be writing and sending evocotive messages or love poems.
The fact that pre-teens and even elementary school aged kids pass from time to time, love poems, means that they are old enough to understand that they are attracted to another person of the opposite sex. This is a natural feeling and desire that everyone goes through growing up and a blessing in disguises for parents, telling them it's the right time to talk to their teen about sex.
The problem is nowadays, these love poems by teenagers are more sexually orientated and have completely eliminated the element of claiming a boyfriend girlfriend friendship like 30 years ago. The love poems teenagers correspond with today lead to much deeper sexual themes and sometimes even the danger of pregnancy.
Tips for Giving a Sex Talk to Your Teenager
- Understand that it is never too soon to talk to a pre-teen or teenager about sex and the difference between love and lust. Human nature has taught us that this is a natural occurrence and if indicated properly from the early warning signs, like a love poem by a teenager, the parents should be able to get up the courage to initiate the conversation about sex.
- Parents who discover love poems between teenagers have an edge over parents who do not because the love poem is a sign, as if your teen is telling you she's ready to talk about sex and love openly. This is the best catalyst to get the conversation going. For example, ask your teenager what the poem means to her instead of assuming. The poem will guide you though the conversations so don't worry about what to say next.
- Don't be surprised by the content of a teenager's love poem. Look at it this way without the love poem indicator, as a parent you may not have gotten a chance to talk to your teenager before she has sex. This way you have an outlet that will help you as a parent guide your teenager in the right direction, before it's too late.
- Parents should not approach the subject of sex with their teenager when upset or even disappointed. And since a teenager can view this negatively, parents want to make the conversation about the subject of sex and not about their teenager having sex. This may appear to teenagers as if they're being accused or punished for writing or receiving a love poem, which will turn the conversation into a disaster and possibility push the teen to do something in rebellion.
- Expressing to a teenager that writing love poems and feeling lust is natural is a good point to make, however, a teen's actions should be thought about in order to avoid future problems. Give an example of problems that sexually active teenagers encounter like, STDs, pregnancy and abortions. Not to mention school reputations and her peer's perceptions of her, if she follows through with certain requests that could be part of a love poem by a teenage boy. This can be the right deterrent at an early age.
- Don't over power the conversation about the teenage love poem. In other words create a dialogue with your teenager, where he or she can express what they are feeling and why they believe they feel this way. Parents will be surprised at the percentage of sexually active teenagers that had sex due to a combination of peer pressures as well as a fear of rejection by the opposite sex.
- Parents should always ensure their teenager can talk to them about sex openly when their ready to go into details. This will help parents to guide their teenager in the right direction, however, still allowing them to make their own decisions, which is what most teenagers want the most. Give your teenager the choice of making her own decision based on your guidance. You may be surprised at how wise your teenager can be if given the chance.
In the end, teenagers, male and female, will encounter Mother Nature's temptations when it comes down to physical attraction among youngsters. Even today, some adults can't handle the pressure their bodies will send them through sexually, so you know it's even harder for an inexperienced teenager. A Parent's committment to Valentine's Day sex talks with their teen can demonstrate true parental responsibility. You know your teenager is ready to get the facts on sexual attractions and you are prepared to give the guidance they need to make the right decision.